So, the other day, I went to get my nails done. Normally, I do my own mani/pedis at home. For me, it saves money and it is a stress-reliever. I like to make it my own self-care spa day. I do my nails, mud mask, eyebrows, and just relax in my robe. I love it. However, I have noticed that I can do so many things at home. I can pay my bills, workout, do my nails, do work and school, get my groceries delivered, etc. This is great and all, but I noticed I would be in my house for days at a time. I was still productive, but I knew that my social and generalized anxiety played a huge part in why I was not leaving the house. So, I decided to go get my nails done.
I have been bringing awareness to social anxiety this month. And part of this awareness, was challenging myself to go in socially anxious situations (You can see my videos on the site and on Anxiety Interruption Facebook Page). I was up for the challenge as I knew it would help not only myself, but many others suffering from social anxiety. So, I made an appointment to get my nails done. I am not going to lie, I was dreading the appointment. Most people enjoy getting their nails done, my mom is one of them. But for me, anxiety tends to take over most of my appointment.
On the rare occasion that I do go to the nail salon, I always have to wait as walk-ins pass me by. Listen, I don't mind waiting, but when I call and make an appointment, and then sit there for 30 minutes, it just gets me anxious and my patience is not very agreeable. Like what is the point of making a reservation? I mean do you think that nail salons should ask restaurants advice on the whole reservation thing? I do! And it literally happens all the time. For a few minutes, you can pick out your color(s), but after that I start to overanalyze what color. Do I want my toes and nails to match? Should it go with a special occasion outfit? The season? Is the nail polish going to look the same on my nails as it does in the bottle? I mean I could just keep going, but I think you get it the point.
Next, is the pedicure chair. I may be the only one that looks awkward getting into the chair with my big purse and bottled water while trying to take off my shoes. Do I remember to wear sandals? Of course, not. I also forget to wear pants that roll up or shorts, so it is difficult to try and roll up my jeans, adding pressure to my ankles and feet turning them into a swollen, hot mess. Once I am in the chair, I will admit that it feels nice to put your feet in the water and lean back. That is until they turn on the massager and you are getting jabbed in every awkward part of your back. I always smile through the constant grimacing, but gosh does it hurt. I should speak up, but I usually just look like I am practicing the robot.
This is where I try and get on my phone. If I do not, I look around and realize I am surrounded by mostly women. Now I am a woman, but us women can be judgmental. I always think they are looking at me. I rationally know they probably are not, but that's part of good ol social anxiety. The irony is with my resting bitch face in tow, they are probably thinking the same thing. But as time goes by, I do start to enjoy it. I am proud of myself for doing it, and I try my hardest to enjoy a few minutes of it. It always feels better when it is done. It is like going to the dentist. Ok, maybe not really, but you know what I mean. So, in conclusion, it was worth it, I faced my fear, and remember to go to the bathroom before your appointment!
I hope you enjoyed the blog, and that it inspires you to face your social anxiety. Please feel free to comment and share your experiences. For more blogs and videos, check out my site www.anxietyinterruption.com and let me know your thoughts. We are also on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Lastly, remember that you are not alone, you are worth it, and together, we will face our fears! :)